First off, forget just walking into a store and picking out a Birkin (lol, as if *that’s* easy anyway). We’re talking special order, baby! This is where you get to design your *own* Hermès bag. I mean, imagine! Picking the leather, the colors, the stitching… It’s like being a fashion god, but with, you know, Hermes.
They call ’em HSS bags, for “Horseshoe Stamp,” because, well, they stamp them with a little horseshoe. Which is kinda cute, right? Signifies that it’s not just *any* Hermès, it’s *your* Hermès. The one you dreamed up.
Now, here’s the catch (and there’s always a catch, isn’t there?). Getting a special order bag isn’t like ordering a pizza. You can’t just call up Hermès and be like, “Yeah, gimme a Birkin, rose confetti with ostrich handles.” Nope. You gotta be *invited* to the party. It’s for the “very best and most important” clients, apparently. So, basically, you gotta be super rich and spend a LOT of money on other Hermès stuff first. Think of it as a loyalty program for the ultra-wealthy. (Makes you wanna cry a little, right?)
And even IF you get the invite, don’t think your bag is gonna magically appear next week. We’re talking *months*. Maybe even *years*. Seriously! The quotes I’ve seen say like… a *year* mininum! That’s longer than some pregnancies. But I guess if you’re dropping that kinda cash, what’s a little waiting, huh? It’s building anticipation, right? Torture? Probably both.
But think about it! You could get, like, a purple Birkin with orange stitching and a lime green interior. Or a Kelly in two different shades of blue. The possibilities are ENDLESS (if you have the money and patience, obviously).
Honestly, the whole thing is kinda ridiculous, but also kinda amazing. Like, the dedication and artistry that goes into these bags is undeniable. And the fact that it’s so exclusive just makes it even more desirable. It’s a status symbol ON TOP of a status symbol. It’s the ultimate flex.
